, Exile a permanent you control with a League of Dastardly Doom watermark: Return a permanent card with a League of Dastardly Doom watermark from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Whenever you crank Accessories to Murder, target creature gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of creatures you control.

Flying

, Sacrifice another artifact: Aerial Toastmaster assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Sacrifice Amateur Auteur: Destroy target enchantment.

Flying

When this creature enters the battlefield, you may destroy target nonland permanent.

Whenever you crank Applied Aeronautics, until end of turn, target creature gets +1/+0, gains flying, and becomes an artifact in addition to its other types.

: Draw a card, then discard a card.

Whenever a permanent that shares an artist with another permanent you control enters the battlefield, untap Artful Looter.

, Sacrifice Ashnod's Coupon: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

Each other Donkey gets +1½/+1½.

Whenever another Donkey enters the battlefield, untap target creature and gain control of it until end of turn. That creature gains haste until end of turn.

Whenever you crank Auto-Key, until end of turn, target creature becomes an artifact in addition to its other types and gains ": You gain 3 life."

Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.

B.F.M. onto the battlefield. If one B.F.M. card

more creatures.

Baron Von Count enters the battlefield with a doom counter on "5."

Whenever you cast a spell with the indicated numeral in its mana cost, text box, power, or toughness, move the doom counter one numeral to the left.

When the doom counter moves from "1," destroy target player and put that doom counter on "5."

Whenever you crank Bee-Bee Gun, until end of turn, target creature gains ": This creature fights another target creature."

When this creature enters the battlefield, roll a six-sided die. Target opponent loses life equal to the result.

: Tear Blacker Lotus into pieces. Add four mana of any one color. Remove the pieces from the game.

When the names of three or more nonland permanents begin with the same letter, sacrifice Bloodletter. If you do, it deals 2 damage to each creature and each player.

Whenever you crank Boomflinger, roll two six-sided dice. Boomflinger deals damage to target player or planeswalker equal to the difference between those results.

Whenever you cast a silver-bordered spell, put a +1/+1 counter on Border Guardian.

Whenever you cast a black-bordered spell, Border Guardian can't be blocked this turn.

Whenever you cast a white-bordered spell, Border Guardian gains double strike until end of turn.

Roll a six-sided die. Create a number of 1/1 red Goblin creature tokens equal to the result.

: Target permanent's artist becomes the artist of your choice until end of turn.

Pursuant to subsection 3.1(4) of Richard's Rules of Order, at the beginning of the upkeep of each participant in this game of the Magic: The Gathering® trading card game (hereafter known as "PLAYER"), that PLAYER performs all actions in the sequence of previously added actions (hereafter known as "ACTION QUEUE"), in the order those actions were added, then adds another action to the end of the ACTION QUEUE. All actions must be simple physical or verbal actions that a player can perform while sitting in a chair, without jeopardizing the health and security of said PLAYER.

When any PLAYER does not perform all the prescribed actions in the correct order, sacrifice Bureaucracy and said PLAYER discards their complement of cards in hand (hereafter known as "HAND").

Bursting Beebles can't be blocked as long as defending player controls two or more nonland permanents that share an artist.

As Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle enters the battlefield, you and an opponent each secretly choose Whack or Doodle. Then those choices are revealed. If the choices match, Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle has that ability. Otherwise, it has Buzz.

• Whack — : Target player loses 2 life.

• Doodle — : You gain 3 life.

• Buzz — , : Draw a card.

target creature gets -x/-x until end of turn, where x is the number of times a capital letter appears in its rules text. (ignore reminder text and flavor text.)

Flying

Gotcha — If an opponent touches the table with their hand, you may say "Gotcha" When you do, return Cardpecker from your graveyard to your hand.

As Censorship enters the battlefield, choose a word.

Whenever a player says the chosen word, Censorship deals 2 damage to that player.

As Charm School enters the battlefield, choose a color and balance Charm School on your head.

Prevent all damage that would be dealt to you by sources of the chosen color.

When Charm School falls off your head, sacrifice Charm School.

If Cheatyface is in your hand, you may sneak Cheatyface onto the battlefield. If an opponent catches you right away, that player may exile Cheatyface.

Flying

Whenever a 6 is rolled on a six-sided die, put a +1/+1 counter on each Bird. (You may roll dice only when instructed to.)

Tap an untapped Bird you control: Roll a six-sided die. (Like now.)

Flying

When Chipper Chopper enters the battlefield, you may sacrifice another artifact. If you do, put two +1/+1 counters on Chipper Chopper and it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Flying

When Chivalrous Chevalier enters the battlefield, return a creature you control to its owner's hand unless you compliment an opponent.

City of Ass enters the battlefield tapped.

: Add one and one-half mana of any one color.

Whenever Clambassadors deals damage to a player, choose an artifact, creature, or land you control. That player gains control of that permanent.

Flying

, Throw Clay Pigeon into the air at least two feet above your head while seated: If you catch Clay Pigeon with one hand, prevent all damage a source of your choice would deal to you this turn and tap Clay Pigeon. Otherwise, sacrifice it.

, : Move the CRANK counter to your Contraption deck's next sprocket and crank any number of that sprocket's Contraptions.

Flying

: Reassemble target Contraption you control. (Move it onto another one of your sprockets.)

Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell.

When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice Common Courtesy.

, Sacrifice Contraption Cannon: It deals damage to any target equal to the number of Contraptions you control.

At the beginning of each opponent's upkeep, that player moves a permanent they control to touch Cramped Bunker and no other permanents. If the player can't, destroy each permanent they control that isn't touching Cramped Bunker, then sacrifice it.

Create a 1/2 blue Bird creature token with flying named Storm Crow.

Storm (When you cast this spell, copy it for each spell cast before it this turn.)

Enchant creature

Curse of the Fire Penguin consumes and confuses enchanted creature.

: Return Deadhead from your graveyard to the battlefield. Activate only if an opponent isn't touching their hand (of cards).

Deal Damage deals 4 damage to any target.

Gotcha — If an opponent says "deal" or "damage," you may say "Gotcha" When you do, return Deal Damage from your graveyard to your hand.

When this creature enters the battlefield, target opponent discards a card.

Whenever you crank Division Table, target player loses 2 life.

Flying

Whenever Do-It-Yourself Seraph attacks, you may search your library for an artifact card, exile it, then shuffle.

Do-It-Yourself Seraph has the text box of each card exiled with Do-It-Yourself Seraph in addition to its own.

Choose another player. Double Deal deals 3 damage to that player. At the beginning of the first upkeep in your next game with that player, Double Deal deals 3 damage to the player.